There is an occasion for everything,
and a time for every activity under heaven:
a time to give birth and a time to die;
a time to plant and a time to uproot …
a time to search and a time to count as lost;
a time to keep and a time to throw away ….
What does the worker gain from his struggles? I have seen the task that God has given the children of Adam to keep them occupied. He has made everything appropriate in its time.
(Ecclesiastes 3:1-2, 6, 9-11a CSB)
The most famous passage in the mysterious book of Ecclesiastes is the poetic section about various seasons in our lives. It’s the reflection of a wise man—Solomon—who has come to realize that the seasons of life march on whether we like it or not. We can respond to those ever-changing seasons in one of two ways: We can dismiss everything as absurdity and hevel, or we can embrace our chapter, use it profitably, and be found faithful in it. The former way leads to disillusionment; the latter leads to happiness.
It takes wisdom to embrace the shifting seasons of life. Fools resist the process, trying to hang on to one particular season and not let it go.
For example, the fool resists aging. But there is a time to let go of your youth. God has not designed life such that you hold on to your youth forever. So stop clinging to it with such desperate tenacity. You are given a chapter of life in which you are full of vigor and beauty and strength, which is a lot of fun. Then you are given a chapter in which your primary contribution should be through your care and wisdom. Too many of us despise that latter chapter and only mourn the loss of our youth.
I know I do this. I wake up in the morning, sore, and all I did the night before was sleep. Evidently going from a seated position to a supine position was enough for my body to cry out in rebellion. I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted without much immediate impact. I could drink a 2-liter of Mountain Dew right before bed, then sleep like a baby. I would pound a half dozen Krispy Kreme donuts and never gain a pound. Now if I have soda after lunch I won’t fall asleep for at least a day, and if I look at a Fig Newton the wrong way I put on a love handle.
I feel, as many of us do, that my youthfulness was wasted on me when I was young. I had all of this energy and time and didn’t know the best way to use it. Now that I have some perspective, I wish I could go back and live that chapter differently. But I can’t. So now I need to focus on the new chapter God has given me. (I also take heart that in heaven, I’ll have the wisdom of an old man and the vigor of a younger one!)
There is a time to let go of your past. Doesn’t it amaze you how many self-storage places there are? When I see new construction around our office, I used to get excited imagining what was coming. And now that the last four projects have been storage units, the excitement is gone. People, what are you doing with all of this stuff? You aren’t using it. Stop clinging to relics from your past in the vain attempt to retain the happiness you had then. It doesn’t work, because happiness isn’t found there.
There is a time to grow up. Many college students will squander some of the most important years in their lives because they don’t want to grow up. They want to remain middle-school adolescents with no responsibility, partying all night and acting like self-centered children who are still taken care of by mom and dad. Cut the umbilical cord and take some responsibility. Childhood is meant to be fun; cherish the memories. But there is a time to become an adult. Yes, it’s full of new challenges. But it’s also full of new opportunities and joys.
And, Solomon says, there is a time to let go of someone. I counsel people all the time who can’t move through a season now that a certain person in their life is gone. It may have been a romantic relationship they thought would last (that didn’t). It may have been a loved one who passed away. The temptation is to think that happiness can only be found back there, with them.
Mourning loss is good and appropriate. But God has a whole life in front of you. Happiness isn’t found “back there” with the one you lost—however you lost that person—but in the present with what God has for you now. God has other people he intends to bring into your life for you to love and bless. You’ll be reunited with many of those you lost one day (God has a season for that, too), but you can’t be a help to the people in your present if you are captive to the past.
God has ordained seasons in our lives. At times we welcome that change. At other times we resist it. Wisdom embraces each chapter and allows God to show us how we can enjoy each one—because we know the Author who is writing every line of every chapter.
